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Accidental-Virgin.ORG
bitched @ 4:25 p.m. on 12-17-03 Just got back from the mall. And yes, I am at work. I left to take Tony to get a couple things and low and behold! Time passed, and now I�m back. I bought some undies from Vikie�s. The 5 for $20 sale. Most of them are pink. I got them in mediums when I know full well that I need large. I did it so that way it�ll make me feel fetter and thus I will stop eating so much. I had fat free pretzels and a Sobe for lunch. I�m actually chewing them now. Nothing special! At the mall I was looking for little knick knacks that I could get for people. I think I have an idea what I�ll get them. It�s not much but it�s just a lil something. No harm. Unless Cindy finds out and says, �You buy your friends� yet again. I�ll slap her. Speaking of her I missed out appointment yesterday because I fucking overslept! Its amazing how fudged up I get when I forget to take my meds. I�m trying to get off Paxil but it�s fucking hard as hell! They say it�s the hardest one to wean off of. And lemme tell ya, it IS! I want to try that Zooloft because I hear it works good if you think people are always judging you. Like, I avoid going to certain places because I feel like people are looking at me and thinking about how fat I am, and how ugly my face is, my clothes� I dunno. It�s weird. Weird because if there one thing about me that doesn�t suck its my clothes! Seriously, this fat thing is getting really bad. So bad that I HATE myself. I have never in my whole life felt so disgusted with myself. I�ve always been the skinny one, I may have had no boobs because of it but shit man, I knew I had a nice bod. My ass was even going on. Now its just a flab, and my stomach, no more. It�s completely gone, its all gut now. I have double chins and everything, my cheeks are two blow fishes. FUCK! I hate it! I want to take a butcher knife and just hack away at myself! This is getting really bad, REALLY REALLY bad. I�m so self conscious now. I feel like, who the hell would want to be my friend? Because I�m hideous!! And the worst part is when people say, �You are not fat!� Because HELLOOOOO!!! YES I AM! I may not be obese but I am fucking thick as hell okay? I hate when people lie to me, so it really pisses me off when I hear people say I�m not fat. UGH! My dad was over last night, we put up the lights. It was hella funny cuz he almost fell off the latter and I thought he was messing around and his arms were all doing windmills and shit. Oh man! It was hella funny. When we got over by the door he was doing something and a bird just flew out and over his head, it touched his hair, I saw. But he didn�t even notice! I was all, �Dad something just flew out over your head!� Needless to say that made him freak the fuck out. Hahahahahaha! Good times, good times. He paid me back, I was surprised, I thought for sure he was gonna ask me for more money. Hmm. My grandpa isn�t doing so good, he thinks he is but he�s not. And its scaring the hell out of me. He kept almost falling yesterday, because his toe hella hurts him. Its all gross and shit and they have to take it off. So, he will lose another toe to the gangrene. Grooooossss! Ew! Ew! Ew! Tony cracks me up, he says that the holidays makes him want to break up with signifigant others and then after the holidays get back together. Can we say cheap mofo? Why yes, I think we can. Man I�m such an internet-whore, I just bought another domain name: Accidental-Virgin.ORG it�s not up yet. I just bought it, and now� It�s mine! Whoop whoop. Okay I gotta go. Peace out. You Know You Love Me, ~JBehrsGurl << | >> MOVED - 09-08-04 test - 08-18-04 Hola El Stupido - 06-09-04 Hola El Stupido - 06-09-04 Whoa Momma! - 05-24-04 Even OLDER... |